Friday, December 14, 2007

Why Do I Bother?

Wrote a snarky, PMS-laced post last week re: organising things with friends:

Why do I bother organising things? My work friends (most of whom have left, but we keep in contact) all wanted to try this amazing Greek restaurant I know. So we organise a day, which takes ages because people keep umming and ahhing and Boyfriend and I don't have any more weekends free til January.

Then we have to pick ANOTHER day, a Wednesday, because it suddenly doesn't suit someone. Then someone gets sunstroke on Saturday so calls me on Tuesday night to cancel. No one RSVPs in time to make a reservation, so I have to keep chasing and end up making up a number to tell the restaurant.

Then on WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON someone calls to ask if it's cool that her partner is a vegetarian. No, it's not, because as they know, it's a set banquet, and it's GREEK FOOD, FFS. LOTS. OF. MEAT AND SEAFOOD. So Wednesday afternoon I have to call, change the numbers, and ask about a vegetarian option. At four pm, someone else RSVPs saying they can't make it after all... this person hasn't said anything before that and I'd forgotten that I'd even invited them.

All I want to do is take my friends somewhere they'd enjoy, and, as always, it just ends up as a mega hassle and I don't even want to fucking go by the end of it, because I'm so annoyed at them all being so fucking difficult.

After the event, I knew why I'd bothered: coz it was great fun. Lovely company and great food, and a very successful night in the end (even with someone else completely forgetting to turn up, we called them and they were at home. Then no apology email or message to any of us the next day, or as yet, which I think is pretty poor form).

Anyway, I don't think I'm gonna organise other events with this group; since though I love them and it was heaps of fun, it's just too much hassle. Some are flakey, some are picky and others are just prima donnas. So while I love them, I'm gonna leave the heavy lifting to someone else. Tis a shame, but what can you do? I don't have the time and energy. I know all twentysomethings are sack, but these guys combined are a nightmare.


The High Priestess said...

you bother because it ends up being a great night out!
I usually call around with a specific set of dates in mind - & then go with the majority: right, this is the night the dinner is on, if you can't make it, tough, the majority can.

Anonymous said...

i completely feel your pain. i love my friends but trying to organise an outing with them is a fucking nightmare. one year one of the cows i love cancelled cos she works for the health board and said the restaurant wasn't somewhere she was prepared to go so i change the locale for her and then the bitch cancels at the last minute anyway! THEN a week later says she went to the place cos she was drunk and hungry. i wanted to kick her in the babymaker. everytime i try and organise crap (or, in fairness, someone else in the group does) SOMEONE has to have a hissy fit about the day, time or place. OR they take ages to reply or cancel the day before with some lamo "oh i'm so tired, i've got a funeral to go to" BLAH BLAH exuse. not really, the funeral comment was for a cheap laugh. usually it's "family dramas". We always have a great time when we go but i'm with high priestess, we have started cutting loose the ones who can't get their shit together and the rest of us go have fun then make sure we rub it in their faces afterwards about what an awesome time we had hahaha. they shit me but i love them. but it puts me off organising stuff and now when i do, i'm like a timebomb waiting for someone to fuck it up as per usual and that vein in the side of my neck starts to pump. i can honestly see why people give up.

emsy x

RandomGit said...

I only organise events with one Person or couple at a time. Less variables to juggle.

Except poker, I always need lots of people for poker. Funnily enough, when I organise poker it includes free scotch, so everyone turns up with little effort for me.

Adam 1.0 said...

It's all about sack

eat my shorts said...

I'm one of those people who would shit you off. I get invited to go somewhere and I'm all keen, and by the time I get home I'm too comfy to go out. So I pike. Yeah, I'm *that* one.

You know what I reckon, don't worry so much about the ones who can't (or in my case, won't) make it out with you - if they can't come out, but still care about your friendship, they'll show it in other ways, and if they don't then they weren't much of a friend in the first place. Cut 'em loose. Life's too short and you could be expending more energy on those who can be bothered to come out.

Desci said...

High Priestess: You're right, you're right.

And I think the dates thing is the best way to go in the future!
emsy: See?! YOU FEEL MY PAIN!

RG: Hee! One-on-one is better, but the group thing's *fun!* And I don't really have time for individual hookups with everyone (and there are some people who I love, but we're not really that close to have an evening by ourselves, you know?)

1.0: Correct.

EMS: Grrr...